Blog - NBC Heads-Up Championships 2010
Friday, 26 February 2010
"The lineup of competitors for this year’s event is the best yet,” said Jon Miller, executive vice president of NBC Sports. “Continually bringing together the best of the best to compete in this unique format has made the National Heads-Up Poker Championship one of the most anticipated poker events of the year.”
Shut UP. Opening your blog with a quote from a spokesperson is not lazy. Much. Eh, whatever.
So, without further ado let us take a look at the thirty-two pairs of players who will be taking each other on for a fat first prize later this month. The list is in alphabetical order with my short summary on each player. I've aimed for six words or less to describe each one of them:
Patrik Antonius - very rich, Finnish poker God.
Eric Baldwin - WPT title, WSOP bracelet, $1.7m
Andy Bloch - good at maths, blackjack and poker
Doyle Brunson - old guy, plays poker apparently
Joe Cada - youngest main event winner, 2010 champ
Johnny Chan - Oriental fella, ten WSOP bracelets
Don Cheadle - actor, shit accent in Ocean's 11
Allen Cunningham - balding but badass poker champ
Pieter de Korver - Dutch guy, EPT title, $3.5m
Annie Duke - UB pro, Lederer's sister
Tom Dwan - durrrr online, killed by Isildur1
Annette Dworski - online qualifier
Peter Eastgate - youngest champion before Cada
Richard Edwards - wrote a poker book, online qualifier
Eli Elezra - ex-Isreali special forces, don't mess
Antonio Esfandiari - magician, Phil Laak's buddy
Sam Farha - Lebanese, fish, WSOP bracelet-winner
Chris Ferguson - Jesus Christ!
Ted Forrest - dapper chap, plays high stakes
Jamie Gold - disliked largely, we think he's cool
Phil Gordon - disliked largely but lots of money
Barry Greenstein - Jewish, awesome, lovely bloke
Bertrand Grospellier - French guy, wins lots of tournaments
Joe Hachem - AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE!
Gus Hansen - Dane! Dane Dane! Nah, doesn't work
Jennifer Harman - mixed game specialist. Nice rack
Phil Hellmuth - ... no comment. Former NBC champion
Orel Hershiser - apparently played baseball. Meh.
Jesper Hougaard - Danish fella, not bad at poker
William Huntress - online qualifer
Phil Ivey - Phil f***ing Ivey. 'nuff said
John Juanda - WSOPE 2008 champion, Full Tilt Pro.
Gabe Kaplan - HSP commentator. Needs AJ Benza.
John-Paul Kelly - had a good 2009, heater continues?
Phil Laak - crazy bloke, nice to interview.
Howard Lederer - Full Tilt Poker head honcho.
Erick Lindgren - finally has a WSOP bracelet.
Mike Matusow - unluckiest player alive
Jason Mercier - final tables EVERYTHING.
Dario Minieri - Italian Harry Potter midget. Pwns HUSnGs.
Chris Moneymaker - the reason you're reading this, really.
Darvin Moon - the most surprising confirmed name.
Greg Mueller - plays online as FBT
Daniel Negreanu - Canadian legend, good poker ambassador
Scotty Nguyen - you call it's all over, baby
Annette Obrestad - Norwegian chick, won WSOPE 2007
Brock Parker - one of 2009's dual WSOP winners
Dennis Phillips - everyman trucker, won millions at WSOP.
Stephen Quinn - online qualifier
Dan Ramirez - online qualifer
Greg Raymer - former lawyer, won WSOP 2004.
Shawn Rice - online qualifier
Vanessa Rousso - quite hot, came second last year
Kara Scott - Canadian HSP beauty, Irish Open runner-up
Huckleberry Seed - reigning champion, multiple WSOP bracelet-winner
Erik Seidel - 22 major tournament victories, Rounders cameo.
Mike Sexton - poker legend, latest Hall of Famer.
Gavin Smith - odd-looking fellabud, cash game pro
Jennifer Tilly - jugs boobs mams, baps, bazookas, nonga-nongas.
Paul Wasicka - Victory Poker pro
David Williams - supposedly likes feet, WSOP runner-up
Andrew Wilson - online qualifier.
Leo Wolpert - won a WSOP bracelet last year
Jerry Yang - raise, one million. WSOP champ/donk.
So, who's going to win? Well, all the former champions - Hellmuth, Ferguson and current, Seed - have a better-than-average shot but heads-up poker is so volatile and this tournament is so short-stacked it's hard to place a bet.
Dario Minieri is my shout, actually. He's a Heads-Up Sit 'n' Go maestro, online no less. He's probably done something like this against tougher comepetition a thousand times. Or I could see Darvin Moon tearing his way to the top spot.
Oh, how hilarious would that be?